I was thinking about the phrase, “The Truth will set me free,” and I hope that is still true. In a time where we are constantly bombarded with “spin” and scripted reality-TV it can be hard to hear the truth over the propaganda, separate understanding from ego, and reject blind-obedience for scientific-method.

I find myself at a crossroads both in my physical health and spirit. Intuitively, I know they are connected. I am on a spiritual trajectory inwards and upwards to my highest self. Yet I am aware that I need to declare my independence from the image people may have of me, who they perceive me and want me to be. To disrobe my compliance for the sake of security. I need to be free, finally, at 50, to be myself. My health and heart require it too. And so here we are reader.

Who am I? – I am Crone. The wise one with scars seen and hidden, whose inner strength as been tested and found worthy. I am the one who loves my experienced life and body with quiet confidence. I am coach, champion and lover of my female clan. I no longer wish to compete or compare but instead to lift, support and inspire. I am not afraid to acknowledge the beauty of others and it does not diminish or negate my own. I am Mother. Fierce and tender; a forgiver of all transgression and singer of lullabies. My arms ready to cradle and hold my babes no matter what age or world they live in. A mother who wants a better world for her children than the one she lives in now. I want them to stop being sexually harassed and marginalized. I want them to feel safe and strong in a school room and a board room. I want them to receive equal pay, equal opportunities and equal rights. I want them to know that I will always support them and love them. Always. Which means:

• I will celebrate and support their love with whoever they choose.
• I will celebrate and support their career choices, whatever they decide to become.
• I will celebrate and support their individual freedom to think for themselves, choose for themselves, and not place my beliefs and ideas as a guilt trip to carry until I am dead.
• I will support and defend them, my fellow sisters and brothers, my LGBTQQIP2SAA friends and family, and any other oppressed and marginalized humans until we once again all feel free.

I have been afraid for a long-time that speaking in a public forum would bring the scorn and judgement that I have avoided since childhood. I expect some of you still reading this will unfriend me, and if it easy to be a friend when we agree but not when we disagree then the choice is easy. There are those of you who know me so well and already know this is who I am so this is no surprise. But it is not my job to be who you want me to be, I am being true to my calling and my purpose.

This will the last entry for the AZBlergBlog, and it is fitting that it be this one. Tomorrow is a new day. The 4th of July. And I am just beginning my freedom. There is so much more to come.